It’s easy to give when the cost is light
and time is easy, but when the price
inflates, I balk, clenching my fists,
refusing to expend, determined
to preserve, because love excavates
all that I have …
all that I am …
exhuming every last thing, flinging
specious pride beyond the city gates
with the rats and the refuse,
a moldering stench of pretension
riven from my fists …
loss upon loss …
upon cascading loss …
till I’m utterly void, destitute, bereft,
and impoverished, heaved onto the ash
heap with Job, hollow, numb,
and sepulchral … oozing
when love bleeds into the hollow,
suffusing Eden’s ache with a touch so
tender it shears self, cleaving pain and
shattering suffering into resplendent
shards of joy, glimpses of a world beyond
the veil. Source and Genesis. Alpha and
Omega. I am steeped in His Spirit, a wine
skin made new, those years the locusts
have eaten He redeems with a word …
Light of the World. Bread of Life.
Shepherd. Gate. Vine. The Way.
The Truth. The Life. Because He is …
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Cindee Snider Re
Author, Photographer, and Co-Founder at Chronic Joy®
Cindee is wife of the man she loves most in this world, mama of five world-shaking creatives (19-27), author of Discovering Hope, Finding Purpose, Embracing Worth and I Take You in Sickness and in Health, photographer, craver of quiet, lover of cotton, denim, Jesus and tea, and co-founder of Chronic Joy®. Cindee and four of her five kids have Ehlers-Danlos, dysautonomia, intractable migraine, and myriad co-existing conditions through which they're learning the deeper the valley, the greater their capacity for joy.