God has provided a way for us, in chronic illness, to have chronic hope. You see, God will use pain to develop you, but He never meant for it to define you. He wants it to become the tool with which He molds you into a person that reflects everything about His character.
“She held his hand like she never wanted to let him go,” my husband told me quietly one evening. It was an unusual statement from him and it caused me to think and to pray. “Lord, is that what my husband wants – to know he is so deeply loved that I never want to let him go?”
As I share my story of depression and what I’ve seen in the dark, my tears descend like falling rain. Their constant flow reveals the pain of much regret; of fragile heart. I cannot stop them once they start.
Trauma belonged to others. I had experienced difficulties in my childhood, but I didn’t feel like I deserved that diagnosis when others had truly suffered.
What keeps me from following through on suicidal thoughts – other than the grace of God – is the pain I would cause my loved ones…
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