What are your strengths and weaknesses as a caregiver? What would you put in your shopping basket to help you? What would you remove? (Karin Fendick)
SHOPPING FOR CAREGIVING TOOLS
I lift up my eyes to the mountains— where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth. (Psalm 121:1-2)
I was running on empty. My body was weary, and my mind and heart were dry. Sometimes, it felt like caring for the needs of my chronically ill wife took up all the time and space in my life. I needed new tools but wasn’t sure I could find the right place to shop for them. I wasn’t even sure I knew what I needed.
I did what people usually do these days: I typed caregiving tools into Google’s search bar. The screen filled with options: article after article of caregiving tips, advertisements for caregivers for hire, and more – but nothing I would call a “tool.”
“God, help me. Where do I start?”
“Why not begin at the beginning?” was His immediate reply.
At the top of the screen was a link for online shopping.
“This is silly,” I snickered as I clicked the link. “The internet can’t help me find what I need.”
The page that opened truly shocked me. It seemed that I could order all the things I could not find anywhere else.
“See?” God declared. “Power tools! My power!”
A DIFFERENT KIND OF SHOPPING LIST
Patience was available in two varieties:
- The patience my wife needed to show me.
- The patience I needed to have with myself while stumbling along this journey.
I put both into my online shopping cart. (Patience does not come naturally. I guess that’s why it’s a “power tool.”)
I was always running out of time to do the things I needed to do, let alone any of the things I wanted to do. So, I ordered an extra-large supply, knowing that I needed to allocate some for myself if I had any chance of surviving. More time would mean more power – and more opportunities to care for my wife.
Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall, but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary; they will walk and not be faint. (Isaiah 40:28-31)
I ordered a monthly flexibility subscription because we can never know what each day will bring. I thought I’d better check my order, not wanting to overspend my budget all at once. There seemed to be more in my cart than I remembered putting there. Anger, frustration, and sadness were in my basket. The only powers they had were painful and destructive.
“I don’t remember putting those in there,” I shouted, “and I don’t want them.”
“It’s all part of the journey,” God replied. “They can’t be avoided but will help you understand your wife better.”
THE ULTIMATE POWER TOOL
“Maybe I need some super-strength, grief-reducing pills,” I mumbled. “My wife is grieving the loss of her old life, and I guess I am too.”
On the sidebar of my screen, an ad popped up with a special offer for The Ultimate Power Tool. It was an endless supply of The Fruit of the Spirit.
But the fruit of the [Holy] Spirit [the work which His presence within accomplishes] is love, joy (gladness), peace, patience (an even temper, forbearance), kindness, goodness (benevolence), faithfulness, gentleness (meekness, humility), self-control (self-restraint, continence). Against such things, there is no law [that can bring a charge]. (Galatians 5:22-23)
How could I pass up an offer like this? I added two, one for myself and another for my wife.
PAID IN FULL
When I clicked on the checkout button, I was worried that the price would be much higher than I could afford. I pulled a credit card from my wallet and typed in the required information. A message in red popped up, saying my card had been rejected. Another attempt gave the same result as did my other credit cards. Defeated, I pressed the Continue button.
Reading the next screen, I began to weep.
“Your payment can not be accepted. All that you ordered is already yours. Your account has been paid in full.”
… having canceled the charge of our legal indebtedness, which stood against us and condemned us, he has taken it away, nailing it to the cross. (Colossians 2:14)
PRAYER
Gracious God, there are never enough words to thank You for who You are. You have already given us all we require to make our way through this life. Help us to believe it. Help us to receive it. We give You all the honor and all the glory. In Jesus’ name, I pray.
QUESTIONS TO PONDER
- What are your strengths and weaknesses as a caregiver?
- What would you put in your shopping basket to help you, and what would you want to remove?
- Are there emotions you believe you should not feel? Which ones, and why?
- Can you remember a tough day, week, or month the Lord helped you through? Jot down the difficulty, the help you received, and a prayer of thanksgiving for the Lord’s care.
Karin Fendick
Contributing Writer
Karin is a handmaiden of the Lord, saved by grace, a worshiper, a poet, a broken heart, a lover of words, His work in progress on the Potter's wheel. She is hungry for truth and amazed by love. After five years in Africa, Karin and Rick (her beloved husband of almost twenty-five years), are back in rural Canada, where chronic pain drives her to the feet of Jesus. She is powered by prayer, love, and many cups of strong coffee. She is the author of From Ashes to Glory (A Psalm a Day).
An Infusion of Hope for Caregivers
God knows how overwhelming caregiving can be, how it can throw the whole balance of our lives inside out and upside down. As caregivers, we need a steady infusion of hope from God's word to do the work He has called us to do.
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