Where Do Butterflies Go At Night?

  OVERLOOKED, LIKE BUTTERFLIES AT NIGHT

I put my dog out late last night and saw a beautiful butterfly on the front porch. At night! I’ve only ever seen butterflies during the day.

NOTICING WHAT IS RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU

So it made me wonder, “Where do butterflies go at night?” Most of us take notice of things or people when they are right in front of us, but sadly, the adage is true, “Out of sight, out of mind.” In the church, we are pretty good at noticing people when they are right in front of us or when something unusual happens: a new baby — here come the casseroles; a death — here comes help to watch the kids or clean the house. However, there is a whole group of people that is sometimes missed: people who are chronically ill — with overlooked chronic illness.

PEOPLE WITH  CHRONIC ILLNESS CAN BE OVERLOOKED

People with chronic illnesses can simply be overlooked. Sometimes, they are people with invisible diseases, so it can easily slip your mind that they are suffering in some way – emotionally, physically, or mentally. When they were first diagnosed, it got your attention – like the colorful butterfly on the flower. You gave sincere love, compassion, and comfort. As time went by and they weren’t at church regularly or they always seemed to miss the Bible study meetings, you forgot them – like the nighttime butterfly you rarely see anymore.

Did you know that chronically ill Christians who have struggled, sometimes for years, often have a very close walk with the Lord? They have become so lonely that they reach out to God and He has indeed become their closest friend. Often their faith can encourage your faith as you see how they trust the Lord amid severe pain and loss. The truth is, you would be blessed to spend time with them. However, they have often been forgotten. Even in a small congregation, they are overlooked. They have fallen off the radar.

No one is asking where the butterfly has gone!

I have experienced this myself. I have five chronic illnesses – degenerative disc disease and fibromyalgia (causing pain and daily headaches for 30 years), lichen sclerosus (a deforming skin disease), follicular lymphoma, and late-stage Lyme disease (misdiagnosed and untreated for decades) – and they will only get worse. How I yearn to answer the phone and have someone say, “I was thinking of you today and wanted to know how you were coping. How can I pray for you?”! Sadly, that hasn’t happened for a very long time.

The night I saw the butterfly, I stood still for a long time with all of these thoughts running through my mind. I don’t blame anyone for forgetting me. I would have done the exact same thing years ago when my life was full, my energy was high, and my lingering daily thought was not, “How can I just make it through today?”

LOOK FOR THE INVISIBLE BUTTERFLIES

As a chronically ill person, my world has gotten very small. I usually only travel about 20 minutes from home. I do the same things almost every day. This is how we cope. We are in pain and can’t always reach out. Overlooked chronic illness is real.

I encourage you to look around and notice someone (a butterfly who used to be visible), someone who may look okay on the outside but is at home hurting every day, someone who may have been forgotten but is still here.

Give them a call, send them a text, or send a #PenToPaper note. Reach out to someone with a chronic illness. I think you will both be blessed.

“I praise you for remembering me…” (1 Corinthians 1:2)

By the way, I’m the pastor’s wife.

First published at  Just Between Us magazine, October 2016. Published with permission.