In the Midst of Grief – Posts, Books & More
Mourning Our Losses
Grief is no stranger to those of us affected by chronic illness, mental illness, pain, and suffering. While there are no rules for grieving chronic loss, there is a road map, and there are fellow travelers ahead and behind us on the journey. Grief often precedes growth.
Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy. (John 16:22)
MOVING FORWARD WITH GRIEF
“We don’t move on from grief. We move forward with it,” writes Nora McInerny
Jennifer Williamson adds, “When grief is part of your life, you learn how to start all over again – over and over again. And that builds courage …”
Continual, sustained loss (and the grief that follows close on its heels) is one of the most energy-depleting aspects of chronic illness and pain. In the face of constant loss, we begin to ask: “Who am I?” “What is my purpose?” “Where and how do I find new meaning?”
GRIEVING WITH HOPE
God doesn’t condemn our grief and sadness. He knows they are a part of our human experience in this fallen world, but He gently reminds us that through His Son, we grieve with hope.
Grief is a journey requiring steady sips of hope, plates filled with God’s unbroken promises, the comfort of community, replenishing rest, fresh air and sunshine, and the unexpected surprise of a blue-winged butterfly.
In this world, we will experience pain, loss, separation, and death, but a better day is coming, a day when death and brokenness no longer have sway. That is our bright hope as we experience grief and sorrow on this long and winding journey Home.
But in the midst of all this pain, there is a strange, shocking, yet very surprising voice. It is the voice of the One who says: ‘Blessed are those who mourn; they shall be comforted.’ That’s the unexpected news: there is a blessing hidden in our grief. Not those who comfort are blessed, but those who mourn! Somehow, in the midst of our tears, a gift is hidden. Somehow in the midst of our mourning, the first steps of the dance take place. Somehow, the cries that well up from our losses belong to our songs of gratitude. Henri J.M. Nouwen
Grief Posts
A Prayer of Dark Despair • When Hope Seems Lost
I find it striking that Psalm 88 includes virtually no words of reassurance. Nowhere does the psalmist add parenthetically, “But you are the Lord of mercy and compassion,” or anything else like this. Most psalms of lament include words of hope. Not Psalm 88. Here we find dark despair.
Unmeasurable Love and Grace
Because of His unmeasurable love and mercy, God looked down on mankind and had compassion. His grace is widespread and bountiful. He never leaves us.
A Chronicle of Grief: Finding Life After Traumatic Loss
Mel Lawrenz
“Eva not breathing. Pray.” For author Mel Lawrenz, that text message was the entrance into the harsh reality of losing his thirty-year-old daughter. Things would never be the same. How could he and his family cope with this devastating loss? In this grief narrative, Mel chronicles how his family struggled to survive the sudden death of their chronically ill and beloved daughter. In raw, vivid episodes, he describes the immediacy of the pain and the uncertainty of what comes next.
Every Moment Holy, Vol. 2: Death, Grief, and Hope
Douglas Kaine McKelvey
Volume 2 of Every Moment Holy is a book of liturgies for seasons of dying and grieving — liturgies such as “A Liturgy for the Scattering of Ashes” or “A Liturgy before a Medical Treatment” or “A Liturgy for Embracing both Joy and Sorrow.” Here are ways to remind us that our lives are shot through with sacred purpose and eternal hopes even when—especially when—suffering and pain threaten to overwhelm us.
Experiencing Grief
H. Norman Wright
At one time or another, we will all find ourselves facing a dark journey—the passage through grief. Experiencing Grief is written for a person who is in the wake of despair grief leaves. This brief but powerful book will help lead readers out of their grief experience through five stages of grief. At the end of the journey is peace and a seasoned, more mature faith.
Expressing Your Grief: Through Poems and Prayers
Discover ways to express your grief and loss honestly. This collection of grief poems may help you put your feelings of loss into words—such as not being ready, struggling with how your loved one passed away, or missing the person.
God in the Dark: Through Grief and Beyond
Luci Shaw
God in the Dark is one woman’s record of her journey through grief and beyond. Poet Luci Shaw shares this journal of her husband’s terminal cancer. It begins with the doctor’s first diagnosis and follows her through the early months of her widowhood. In these pages, we see the complexities of a fragile three-way relationship — between a man, a woman, and God.
A Grace Disguised: How the Soul Grows through Loss
Jerry Sittser
Loss came suddenly for Jerry Sittser. In an instant, a tragic car accident claimed three generations of his family: his mother, his wife, and his young daughter. While most of us will not experience such a catastrophic loss in our lifetime, all of us will taste it. And we can, if we choose, know as well the grace that transforms it. A Grace Disguised plumbs the depths of sorrow, whether due to illness, divorce, or the loss of someone we love.
A Grief Observed
C.S. Lewis
Written after his wife’s tragic death as a way of surviving the “mad midnight moment,” A Grief Observed is C.S. Lewis’s honest reflection on the fundamental issues of life, death, and faith in the midst of loss. This is a beautiful and unflinchingly honest record of how even a stalwart believer can lose all sense of meaning in the universe, and how he can gradually regain his bearings.
Grief's Compass: Walking the Wilderness with Emily Dickinson
Patricia McKernon Runkle
“The Wilderness is new–to you. Master, let me lead you.” Emily Dickinson wrote these words to her mentor shortly after his wife died. In “Grief’s Compass,” Patricia McKernon Runkle takes Dickinson as her guide after the devastating loss of her brother. As she charts a path through the holy madness of grief and the grace of healing, she finds points on a compass and lines from Dickinson that illuminate them.
Hope Heals: A True Story of Overwhelming Loss and an Overcoming Love
Katherine Wolf et al.
When all seems lost, where can hope be found? Katherine suffered a massive brain stem stroke without warning. Miraculously, Jay came home in time and called for help. Katherine was rushed into surgery, though her chance of survival was slim. Through 40 days on life support and nearly 2 years in full-time brain rehab, Katherine gradually recovered. Years later, they are stewarding their story of suffering, restoration, and Christ-centered hope through their ministry Hope Heals.
I Will Carry You: The Sacred Dance of Grief and Joy
Angie Smith
In 2008, Angie and her husband Todd (lead singer of the group Selah) learned through ultrasound that their fourth daughter had conditions making her “incompatible with life.” Advised to terminate the pregnancy, the Smiths chose instead to carry this child and allow room for a miracle. That miracle came the day they met Audrey Caroline and got the chance to love her for the precious two-and-a-half hours she lived on earth.
A Letter of Consolation
Henri J.M. Nouwen
This book reflects on the spiritual significance of death and life in this moving meditation dedicated to “all those who suffer the pain that death can bring and who search for new life.” A long letter to Nouwen’s father after the death of his mother. A book to pass on to anyone who is going through a period of grief after loss.
Letters to Grief
Kate Motaung
Since everyone endures loss in their own way, this collection of nine reflective letters to grief personified is descriptive, not prescriptive. It offers readers encouragement and hope to deal with loss and grief in the midst of their own unique circumstances. Readers are invited to reflect on their personal grief experience by writing in the journaling pages throughout the book.
Sacred Tears: Simple Reminders That God Sees You and Loves You
Lindsey Wheeler
This collection of heartfelt essays, eye-catching word art, inspiring Scripture verses, honest prayers, and uplifting photography will meet you in your place of pain, offering solace and refuge for your weary soul. Lovingly written by a pastor’s wife and adoptive mom who lives with chronic pain, Sacred Tears will bring you the blessed respite you’ve been longing for and remind you that you are never alone.
Seasons of Sorrow: The Pain of Loss and the Comfort of God
Tim Challies
An honest look at grief and fears, faith and hope. Combining personal narrative, sound theology, and beautiful writing, this is a book for anyone who has loved and lost. Discover how it is possible to love God more after loss than you loved him before.
Through a Season of Grief: Devotions for Your Journey from Mourning to Joy
Bill Dunn
If you’ve lost a spouse, child, family member, or friend, you’ve discovered that few people understand the deep hurt you feel. Where do you turn for daily comfort and help? How do you move forward? This book is a helpful 365-day devotional designed to support and uplift you in the first, most difficult year of bereavement.
Turn My Mourning into Dancing
Henri J.M. Nouwen
In times of suffering, simplistic answers ring empty and hollow. But Henri Nouwen, beloved spiritual thinker and author, offers real comfort in the concrete truth of God’s constancy. Nouwen suggests that by greeting life’s pains with something other than despair, we can find surprising joy in our suffering.
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When You Go Through Deep Waters
“When you go through deep waters, I will be with you.” (Isaiah 43:2)
True Joy Difficult Seasons
“… true joy is formed in the midst of the difficult seasons of life.” (Frances Chan)
Grief is Great Love
“When we grieve over someone who has died in Christ, we are sorrowing not for them, but for ourselves. Our grief isn’t a sign of weak faith, but of great love.” (Billy Graham)
Grief is a Holy Madness
“Grief is a holy madness … a wilderness we wander in search of the sacred …” (Patricia McKernon Runkle)
Navigating Grief
“When someone is navigating grief … we must resist the need to try and fix the problem … during these sacred times, silence is our ally.” (Jada Swanson)
Sing Sad Songs
“When you sing your sad songs, I will learn the words and sing along.” (Ellie Holcomb)
Dam of Grief
“A hidden dam of grief had broken— making way for fresh hope and joy.” (Lee Ann Zanon)
Grief Feels So Like Fear
“No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear.” (C.S. Lewis)
Dance of Life
“The dance of life finds its beginnings in grief … It is the way in which pain can be embraced, not out of a desire to suffer, but in the knowledge that something new will be born in the pain.” (Henri Nouwen)
Hope That Overwhelms Grief
“The glory of the Christian life is that we have a hope that overwhelms grief. It doesn’t eradicate it. It sweetens it. It overwhelms it.” (Timothy Keller)